Praying For A Miracle: NY Superbowl Edition

I was on twitter last night minding my own business when I happened across this tweet by Chris Mortensen of ESPN:

Only legit argument against NY/NJ is that it's a QB/offense driven league & wind (not snow) is neutralizing element. That's life in NFL.

Now because it looks as if the Superbowl bid going to New York/New Jersey is a forgone conclusion I hadn't felt the need to weigh in on whether I thought it was a good idea or a bad idea, but since Mortensen is saying that there's only one legitimate argument against it I figured I would go ahead and give my two cents.

Its not a bad idea, its a turrible idea!

And yes I used my Charles Barkley voice.

Let me first begin by stating the obvious case against it. Its cold.

I'm going to repeat that.

It's COLD.

I grew up in Memphis under the illusion that I actually liked cold weather. See I had this philosophy that no matter how hot it got outside there were only so many clothes you could take off before you got in trouble. But if its cold you can always just put on more layers.

Sounds good right?

Yeah, that worked right up until I spent a year on the roster of the New York Jets. That philosopher worked for "Memphis cold", but New York cold laughed at my ass.

Right to my face.

I know that New York folks will now come at me calling me all kindsa punks for hating the cold weather. Well guess what? I'll be that. But what we all have to acknowledge is that it being oppressively cold outside does not make for a a great tourist experience.

And make no mistake about it, yeah there's a game played during Superbowl week but Superbowl is about a LOT more than just the game.

I realize there will be tons of things to do in terms of night life and there are certain very high profile tourist attractions you can visit indoors, but answer me this. What in hell are most average fans in town to "experience" a Superbowl going to do during the day?

See I know what they do during the day when the Superbowl is in San Diego or Miami, or Tampa or New Orleans. They go take the kids to the many football camps in and around the city. They go visit the NFL Experience. They walk around downtown star watching/drinking/networking etc. If there's a beach involved that's always a popular hangout during the day.

Who in hell is going to walk outside in New York or New Jersey in late January early February for anything other than an emergency?

For this Superbowl to work from a fan's perspective everybody involved will have to pray to Al Gore that global warming not only exists (believe me it does) but that it will also greatly accelerate just in time for it to be nice and toasty in New York and New Jersey in the winter of 2014 (believe me it won't).

Don't get me wrong, I realize and appreciate the stature New York has as a media mecca and one of the major cities of the world, not just the United States. But there is one thing that negates all of that.

Its going to be cold!

But understand this, it being cold is but just one problem I have with the Superbowl being in NY/NJ. Can't we keep it real for a minute? New York is and always will be a target for terrorists. Now I am not of the mind that we should live our lives in fear of these idiots and their warped religious ideology, but facts are facts. For what every reason they are almost singularly obsessed with attacking that city. Having a Superbowl there is almost like putting kobe steak in front of a pitbull. Now I have full faith in the both the NYC police force and our federal government to protect New York from an attempted terrorist attack during the Superbowl, but have you thought about the measures they will have to take in order to do so?

If you think you hated flying before, just wait until you try to fly in to JFK or La Guardia for Superbowl. Imagine the show of force they will necessarily have to have around all league sponsored events. Hell I wouldn't be surprised if they either totally or partially closed down Times Square for that matter.

And really, could you blame them?

Again this is just the reality of the situation. Oh and by the way all of that security is going to cost a LOT of money for all you arm chair deficit hawks out there. Freedom isn't free after all.

So those are two of the negative aspects of the decision from a fan's perspective, but what about the game. Is it true that the only on the field worry that is legitimate is that wind is a neutralizing element in a quarterback driven league?

.....

.....

That's maybe the most naive take I have ever seen from a guy who generally is actually pretty reasonable.

You know who the snow and cold and wind might effect more than the quarterback?

THE KICKER!

But it's not just that this game is inviting an outcome decided by a bad long snap, a poor hold, or a slip right as the kicker makes contact.

No, the weather conditions will affect all of the players.

When its cold its not only hard to throw the ball, its also hard to catch it. And then after catching it, its hard to keep hold of it. Ball security will be the biggest loser in this game. And remember that historically its not just cold you have to be worried about in NY/NJ in February. There's this stuff called snow, and its white and wet and it can cause all kinds of chaos on a football field.

Tuck rule anyone?

Oh and if it snows hard enough no amount of HD in the world will make watching the game an enjoyable experience.

Also you know what players have a hard time doing in the cold?

Tackling.

Some of the worst tackling games you will ever see happen in sub freezing temperatures. Again, this is a fact, not just conjecture. Imagine trying to tackle a physical back like Adrian Peterson or Frank Gore when its 15 degrees outside.

Yeah, good luck with that.

Speaking of which, the league whilst praying to our former Vice President had better also cross their fingers that two iconic teams play in that game. Hey if its a Cowboys/Steelers game, cool. If its the Patriots/Giants, its all good. If its the Vikings/Jets, no problem.

But what if its the Seahawks and the Panthers? Or how about the Titans and the Lions?

Man do you REALLY think you are going to see a bunch of Panther's fans in New York kicking it? Do you really think the Titans have that kind of following?

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIID

If one of the local teams gets in or one of those teams with big followings gets in then yeah you might get a sold out stadium of die hard fans willing to sit in the cold and cheer on their team to victory. If anybody else gets in they will have to hire people to sit in the stand like they do at the Oscars.

But I digress.

How about a more practical concern like.....logistics?

Where exactly are the two teams supposed to practice for two weeks? And please don't give me some cockamamie answer about practicing in a bubble. I've practiced in a bubble before and you ain't getting a lot done inside a bubble. NFL teams generally practice on two separate football fields, one for offense and one for defense. If you think a team is going to get the kind of preparation they need to play in the biggest game of their season if not for some of them their career practicing in a bubble I'm going to need you to pee in a cup.

So you're going to have two potentially woefully underprepared teams playing in probably much less than ideal conditions in the biggest game of the year not just for them but also for the league.

Seriously.

I know there are a bunch of coaches and GMs and owners coming out publicly to support the bid but really what else could they do at this point? If they know its going to happen why fight upstream just to invite scorn and ridicule? But understand this, if and when this game goes off and its an epic failure a lot of those same folks pumping it up in front of the cameras will be behind the scenes whispering "I told you so".

Now I will join everybody else in praying for a miracle that the game goes off without a hitch because I don't want to see the Superbowl fail in any year or in any city. But there are definitely a bunch of legitimate reason to not support this bid. To say that there aren't is to have a total disregard for reality and the facts on the ground. Sorry Mort but I can't drink that kool aid.